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PS 1939 
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ORIGINAL POEMS, 



SENT1MENTAL,PATRI0TIC, IIUMOEOUt^ 



AND AIJTO-BIOGEAPHIG. 



^ 



JiY 



E^^H. S, HOLDEN, M, D, 



IIOLEEOOK, LOXG LSLAjN^). 



Copyriglited 1886. 






i MP.Y 12 1887 ^ 

- '^ OF WASH '<^- 



"A Youtli," (that's borrowed, as jou all may know; 

If lie means me, 'tis seventy vears ao-o \ 
" To fortune and to fame unknown," 

This, T affirm, though borrowed, is my own. 



^ 

I 






ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN" OCTOGENARIAN. 



0:S BOOKS. 

P BOOKS, as men, variety we find ; 

Some good, some bad, some coarse and some refined. 

In some you'll surely find a wealthy mine 

Of Heaven-born Science (laws of God Divine). 

A youth, devoted to the classic page. 

Provides a Solace for advancing age — 

Emitting lustre o'er life's evening day, 

And cheering onward with her peaceful ray. 

Which (like the Sun declining in the West) 

More radiant glows before his final rest ; 

They who, for mere amusement only read, 

Of vain repentance sow the bitter seed ; 

Their tastes demoralize, their mind decays, 

Their conversation ignorance betrays. 

He, whose preferments ribald writings crave 

To groveling vice succumbs, a willing slave ; 

Who spurns the treasures of a well-stored mind 

In worthless trash his pleasure seeks to find. 

Like the shoal brook enfed by slimy shims. 

Though more receiving, shallower becomes. 



ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGENARIAN". 



OJSr READlISrG. 

Though GREAT the author, and though true the fact, 

'Tis worthless if the reader lack the tact 

To rightly judge between the true and false, 

This to accept, the former to eschew. 

In other words, the ground must be surveyed 

On which the author's mental tracks were laid, 

And traced the steps of his investigation. 

To find the cause of his determination ; 

If with our reason clearly it agrees, 

The knowledge is our own, if not, 'tis his ; 

We yield submissivelv a servile assent. 

And with our ignorance remain content. 



LINES ADDRESSED TO A YOUNG FRIEND ON HIS 
LEAVING HOME FOR COLLEGE. 

As bees, disporting through the sunny hours. 
Sweet honey gather from promiscuous flovvers 
Of vivid scarlet, or cerulean blue, 



ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGEKARIAN. 

Unsullied whiteness or of sable hue, 

So thou (as from a friend), from bitter foe, 

(Spurn not the anger which thy vices show ; 

For friends, too oft, in this you must agree. 

Virtues overpraise and fail defects to see. 

Choose those as fit companions for thy youth, 

Who think no sacrifice too great for truth ; 

But shun the man whose taste is so perverse 

That him who 's bad, will vilify as worse. 

Be sin thy hate, but let the veil be drawn 

Of charity for sinners, though the thorn 

Of sin may be by condemnation wrought. 

Through penitential tears to virtue broug:ht. 

If calumny assail thy friend or foe. 

Quickly the last defend, the first more slow, 

Thy words will prove more heavy through thy hate 

Than eloquence of friend, however great ; 

The charge of partiality would lay 

'Gainst all the approving words a friend could say. 

But when defends his foe the generous youth. 

All must admit the potency of truth. 

Shun as a viper, with disdain extreme, 

The man who holds not woman in esteem ; 

Abhor the man who would so look or speak 

That blush would tingle on fair woman's cheek ; 



ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN^ OCTOGEJf ARIAN. 

And inay'st thon be to other beauties blind 

But those reflecting excellence of mind. 

Remember, "Time 's a talent only lent," 

Let not the moments of thy youth be spent 

In wasteful idleness, or wanton thought, 

But with sound learning and with virtue frauglit ; 

Such will a source of happiness unfold, 

When you arrive at years considered old. 

Few be the years, at most, before the head 

That framed these lines is pillowed with the dead ; 

But may the lessons which I here impart 

ileceive a welconie in your geuerous heart. 

Such is my wish, your ever-faithful friend. 

Till life and all its joys and sorrows end. 



ON IIAPPTNP]SS. 

He who'd have happiness at heart 

To others mu^it that bliss impart ; 

For, 't is a fact, as all men know. 

What man would reap, he first must sow, 

No selfish motives can impart 

The riches of a generous heart : 



ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGENAIIIAN. 

But who'd possess the precious treasure, 
Must reap his joy iu others' pleasure; 
Must freely on himself impose 
The burthen of another's woes ; 
For the afflicted sorrow feel, 
Assuaging wounds he cannot heal. 
No frown should e'er deform his face, 
But, full of every Christian grace. 
His heart must bound with generous love, 
(The fruit of virtue from above). 
Smoothing with peace throughout his life 
The wrinkles of discordant strife ; 
For others' griefs must sympathize 
And dry the tears of Sorrow's eyes ; 
Though seeming paradox and strange. 
We can, for gladness, grief exchange. 
By lightening another's care, 
p]v()ke a bk^ssin^j: each may shan?. 



ODE TO WOMAN. 

I. 

Who knows the depth of woman's love, 
To man in mercy given? 



ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGENARIAN. 

No sordid offering of Earth, 
A boon vouchsafed by Heaven. 

II. 
There is a Heaven in woman's sinilo, 

A sadness in her tear, 
A sting more withering in her scorn 

Than all beside Vd fear. 

III. 
There is a witchery divine, 

To cheer Life's dreary span, 
In woman's heart, doth gently twine 

Around the heart of man. 

IV. 

Thy presence, Woman, cheers the gloom. 
Edges with sheen the clouds of earth ; 

Thy sympathies our joys enhance, 
Tn our griefs thou prov'st thy worth. 

v. 

Did I, as some affect, opine 

Fair woman but for dalliance born. 

My happiest hours had thwarted been 

Of Earth's most precious treasures shorn. 



ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN orXOGENARIAN. 
VI. 

No happier moments e'er I know 

TliJiii those wiiicli from her accents flow, 

No fitter means my sonl prepare 
To Ivneel hefore my God in prayer. 

VII. 

He, of base villains is the worst, 
Who, projects vile doth make, 

By arts to win (the wretch accnrst) 
A woman's heart to break. 

VIII. 

A hero's fame were cheaply earned 

My blood's last drop to pour. 
To rescue Woman from the toils 

Of the destroyer's power. 



ON CHARITY OF THE HEART, or, TRUE PHILAN- 
THROPY. 

No cause to call all men unkind 
If you possess a generous mind. 
The world is, as a mirror, true, 



10 ORIGIN'AL POEMS BT AN OCTOGENARIAN. 

As others pass reflecting you. 

If with a smile you others t^reet, 

You'll find the world will never brook, 

An angry tone or surly look. 

All have not means the poor to feed, 

Or kindness prove by generous deed, 

But a kind look and gentle word, 

The very poorest can afford. 

If we against our neighbor rail 

Our prayers but little will avail. 

Condemn not others too severe, 

But thy shortcomings rather fear ; 

Our TRUEST friend and spiteful foe 

Our grievous sins will freely show. [love, 

Though THIS from hate and that from 

In use discreet, will wisdom prove. 



ON THE DEVOTION OF THE HEART. 

When I compare the fervent zeal 
That glows within the Pagan's heart 
Bowing to senseless stone, 
My languid lips deserve reproach 
When I Thy sacred courts approach 



OKIGINAL POEMS BY AN^ OCTOGENARIAN". 11 

And kneel before Thy throne. 
Though mefcaphoric flowers of speech, 

The coinage of the bruin, 
May soothe an earthly monarch's ear, 

They're idle words and vain. 
Anthems harmoniously composed, 

Melodiously sung, 
Are nought but empty sound unless 

The heart attune the tongue. 



! ON SEEKING KNOWLEDGE. 

If you wish another's opinion to know. 

Avoid by all means your own knowledge to show, 

For, if he suppose that you know more than he.. 

He may not feel disposed to communicate free. 

From one who in learning is far you behind, 
Ton much information may frequently find, 
rhere's hardly a man, be he noble or mean. 
Prom whom you may not some intelligence glean. 

Interrogate Nature.; she's ever at hand. 
In the siar-spangled heavens, broad ocean and land, 
'What the insect minute from our eyes may conceal. 
The vast megatlierium may clearly reveal. 



12 ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGEXAKIAN. 



THE FALL OF FORT SUMPTER. 

America ! land of the Free ! 

Well may thy sons be provid of thee ! 

May no dark cloud 

The brightness of thy sky enshroud, 

And may. Oh ! may it e'er be thine 

To kneel at Liberty's and Virtue's shrine. 

Here healthful Labor spreads her ample store, 

That honest Industry need ne'er be poor. 

Here bright-eyed Science and all-busy Art 

Will find their \rorthy mead— a ready mart — 

Her healthful climate and her generous soil 

Repay the husbandman's laborious toil; 

Her eastern cities' work of busy hands, 

The Avealth of the community expands. 

Her whiten'd sails wide-spreading to the breeze, 

Bring home the products of the distant seas, 

To favored sons of luxury and ease ; 

Thus silken fabrics curiously wrought. 

From Eastern India's swarthy shores are brought 

And from the land of sempiternal Spring 

Her vessels odoriferous spices bring : 



ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN" OCTOGENARIAN. 13 

1'liiis did the ships of her prolific shores 
[ito the lap of Commerce pour their stores ; 
Thus did Prosperity our country woo, 
Which, in Arts, Wealth and Science, proudly grew. 
Her rise so rapid, such applause she drew 
That older nations wondered at the view ; 

Our cities fabled history outvied. 

Of Arts and Science, in the rapid stride. 

The plan matured on which her genius laid 
Her broad foundation and her liberal trade ; 
All men as brothers, welcomed to her shore, 
Who love mankind and who their God adore ; 
The outcast Patriot and the exiled King- 
May rest beneath her Eagle's sheltering wing. 
Lately the last link of bondage she broke. 
When Superstition's foot shall touch her talismanic shore. 
Where the slave groaned beneath the galling yoke, 
Plis rankling shackles fall and he is slave no more. 

(jast, though not least, throughout her broadcast land, 
^he rears her temples for her infant band, 
Modest in look, not formed for pride of show. 
Built to help her tender plants to grow ; 
For all these favors bouuteously given. 
Hymns redolent of praise ascended lieaven ; 



14 ORIGINAL POEMS BY AX OrTOGEXARIAX. 

But, as no biimai] kiio^A ledge e'er can bind 
The uncertain veerings of the fickle wind, 
So can no mortal e'er presume to know 
The coming morrow's weight of weal or wo : 
Thus, as in Heaven, erst foul Rebellion rose, 
Passions malignant, impious rage disclose. 
So Earth, most favored, less content contain, 
Nor over all do Truth and Virtue reign, 
But scowl-eyed Treason and her impious band. 
With rage demoniac, tried to subvert the land, 
A deed so monstrous and so fonl a blast 
On History's page made Nature stand against ; 
Benignant Nature, at the aspect frown'd. 
In dismal darkness draped the scene around. 
As mothers fondly o'er their infants close 
The sable curtains to invite repose. 
Grim is the picture when embitter'd strife 
Gluts with another's blood the reeking knife, 
When different nations, in discordant jar. 
Conflicting troops oppose in hostile war ; 
Hut when by brother brother's life is sought, 
The blood encnrdles at the dreadful thought. 
Fain would T drop the curtain o'er the scene, 
Or interpose ai)o!ogy between. 



ORIGINAL POEMS BT AN OCTOGENARIAN. 15 



How oft we mortals give an honor'd name 

Where Cliristianitj would blush for shame ! 

'T is sad to think how oft the slightest flaw 

Will cause a nation to engage in war. 

When passion leads we argue wrong is right, 

And each prepares to organize the fight, 

To wounded honor claim the battle due. 

And each with equal rancor each pursue. 

The inadd'ning wine-cup, or the bigot's hate. 

Foul Euvy or Revenge insatiate, 

Relentless Rage, malicious-hearted Spite, 

The blood nniy seethe, and cruel deeds incite. 

Such spurious courage, when the deed is done. 

Will wilt as herblets in the morning sun ; 

But genuine courage doth base means refuse ; 

Then sing his praise aloud, admiring Muse, 

Who. in a noble cause, so noblj stood ; 

True courage dwells but with the just and good. 

At Maior A.nderson's heroic name 

A nation's breast should glow with generous flame. 

His courage, such as Heaven alone supplies. 

All human power, all human force defies.' 

Below the golden west had gone the sun, 

The weary laborer's toilsome work was done. 



16 ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGENARIAN. 

Silence and Darkness their mild vigils keep, 

Quiescent Nature woo'd the world to sleep. 

The silent air, the stillness of the ocean, 

Might soothe the pensive soul to calm devotion, 

And seem to speak, as the Creator's will, 

To seas and human passions, "Peace ! Bo stiil !" 

Happy had man obey'd the just decree, 

And, with due reverence, bent the suppliant knee. 

'T were easier to roll back the ocean's tide 

Than stem the impetuous course of human pride. 

Eight bells proclaim'd the hour. No ripple stirr'd 

The bosom of the deep. No sound w^as heard. 

But soon, how changed ! Ere thirty minutes passed, 

Tlie booming cannon with its deaf ning blast, 

Awoke the slimib'rers from their soft repose, 

And lurid glare around the scenery throws. 

A pause ensued, as if the conscious thought 

(Reflecting) grieved the mischief she had wrought ; 

Such might, sweet Charity, be thine appeal ; 

No such regret such miscreants ever feel. 

But, lost to all that's generous, good or great. 

Would sap a nation for a small estate. 

Now, with redoubled fury, near and far. 

Gleamed the artillery of tumultuous war, 



ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGENARIAN. 17 

at, like volcanoes from the uplifted sea, 
e explosive blasts appear that rend the air ; 
though Creation's vault wide opened there, 
eir furious verberations rock the shore ; 
th ghastly flashing and tumultuous roar, 
3onderous avalanche of bursting shell, 
ainst the liberty-devoted fortress fell, 
was thus without. The fortress wall within, 
e hei'oic band their morning meal begin, 

if preparing for a grand parade ; 
ey leisurely repast, and then obey'd 
eir valiant chief ; and thus his orders : 

quick succession answer gun for gun !'' 
serabling a continuous clap of thunder, 

if the very earth were riven asunder. 
e gallant band, although in number few, 
ere, every soul a hero, tried and true ; 
on finding that their cartridges were spent, 

an expedient their sleeves they rent, 
leir midday meal at noon they took, 
it not one man his post forsook, 
it, each one, standing by his gun, 
is scanty dinner thus begun, 
le last hard biscuit and snlt pork, 



18 OKIGIN^AL POEMS r>Y AX O^TOrjEN-AKTAX. 

I 
j 

And calmly then resiiQiecl tboir work. 
So kept they on till iiiglit came round. 
When wearied Nature comfort found. 
In the calm slumber Duty knows 
In midst of dangers, death and foes. 
The morning breaks ; now see within. 
Unruffled by the cannons' din, 
In spirit unsubdued and undisniay'd, 

True, noble-hearted courage there displayed 

'Mid fire and smoke and sraoth'ring smell. 

And bolts and balls and showering shell, 

(Now entering in, in fitful gust) 

Explosive coals and cinder-dust ; 

In conflagration fore and ]aft, 

In spiral columns skwyard waft ; 

Yet did that band, that valiant band. 

True heroes, nobly, proudly stand ; 

Could human power such force combined withst; 

To human force must yield the work of human 

Strong walls must crumble, stubborn stone must 

The oft-repeated blows at last revealed 

A breach, and in that embrasure 

One, bearing flag of truce, appear'd and^said : 



ORlOraAL POEMS liY AN OOTOGENARIAN. 1<J 

" VVli3^ madly rush unto the deatli ? 

Your bravery deserves exalted praise, 

Which we accord you with the greatest pleasure ; 

But all things have a limited duration ; 

It were impossible to hold much longer, 

If een vour armaments were ten times strongfer : 

My General sends his compliments ; you'll state 

The terms on which you will capitulate ; " 

Now, Major Anderson was of that sort 

Whose actions synchronize their thought ; 

He there in pride of manhood firmly stood, 

Above the wreck of matter vile and rude. 

A man, indeed, was he : for. that name 

The titles ''Patriot,'' "Christian," "Hero" claim ; 

A trusty soldier in his country's cause, 

A firm defender of her rights and laws ; 
'• But two days since, your General heard 

My terms. I go not now behind my word ; 

Whether or death or danger, wounds or S(;nrs. 

I do insist upon the Stripes and Stars ; 

And from these terms before I'll falter. 

I'll spill my blood upon my country's altar." 



20 ORTGIN'AL POEMS BY AN" OnTOr^RN-AKIAN". 



BOILED BOOTS ; Or, THE SPORTSMAN'S PRIDE. 

I'll tell yoii of a certain man, 

'T is since this century began. 

It happened that this sorry wight, 

Was footman to a certain knight ; 

This knight (I know the story 's true) 

Was Sir John F , as 1 tell you ; 

Sir John, in hunting pleasure found, 

In scampering briskly o'er the ground ; 

With boots and spur, and bit and bridle, 

He, in the chase, was never idle. 

As Sir John dress'd in Fashion's height. 

His boots must certainly shine bright. 

So, of Sam's duties 'twas a part. 

In polishing, to show his art. 

One evening, Sam, as he ought. 

The bootjack to his master brought ; 

But, boots in hand, away he went, 

On his next duty then intent. 

Some things we do, so prompt 's the act. 

The mind seems not to note the fact. 



ORIGINAL POEMS BY AX orXOGENARIAX. 21 



All instance this : Sam, in liis liaste, 
Tlie boots upon the copper placed. 
It so occuitM that, the next morn, 
The maiden rose before the dawn. 
The reason wiiy, T here will say : 
It happen'd to be washino- day, 
And as the maiden raised the lid. 
The boots into the copper slid. 
Sam soon arose with calm ccnnposure. 
Xot dreaming of tlie day's disclosure : 
}lis duty first the horse to groom. 
And clean the stall with fork and broom, 
And then, with hrnsh and blacking. 
He sought the boots, but they were lackin; 
He paced the sculTry round and round, 
And yet could not the boots be found. 
''Where are the boots?"' he oft repeated, 
f3ut no response his accents greeted. 
While thus empl^^y'd he heard a shout. 
And ran to see what t'was about : 
And when the maiden stirrM the clothes, 
A something from the foam arose ; 
Sam little time could spare to wait. 
And of its nature judicate. 



22 ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGENARIAN. 

VVhiit color 't was 't were liard to say. 

K grayish brown or hrowiiisli gray ; 

If shape belongVl to such a being, 

It only con Id be known by seeing; 

It snrely seeni'd to bid defiance 

To laws of mathemntic science : 

To worship it no prohibition 

Was found on decalogue condition : 

T" was loug since Sam believed in witches, 

That words could be transforni'd to riches, 

If by a spiite or fairy uttered. 

Or by a muzzled moukey mutter'd. 

That boots could through a key-hole creep. 

And stra}' from home while good folks sleep 

So, stole they were was his conclusion. 

Or lost, Avhich caused him much confusion ; 

Concluding it a fruitless chase, 

Sam now had sfiven up the race ; 

AVhile thus perplexed in rumination, 

He heard a boisterous exclamation ; 

The cause of this omniferous sound, 

Another reptile had they found. 

Enslaved by Superstition's chain. 

To terror Reason yields the rein. 



ORIGINAL POEMS liY AN OCTOGENARIAN. 23 

Submit one sense to terror's sway, 

The others passively obey ; 

(^Should it be tlioiight a thing so strange 

Boots slionld be boiPd l)y way of cliange ? 

Who lias not heard of puffs of boots 

As well as njedieinal roots ?) 

She has the rising bubble broke, 

Declared the heteropodos spoke. 

Sam followed in the sound's direction, 

Resolved to uiake a close inspection. 

Now, as the Roman poet sings, 

bVar once to boots appended wings ; 

Had he been there upon that day, 

He might averted much dismay. 

Sam went, he saw and asked the maid. 

Who all her rhetoric displayed— 

With blanched lips and features pale, 

Told at full length her doleful tale, 

With long words of exhausted sense, 

In multiverbal eloquence. 

Sam might have laughed if not oppressed 

By too much grief upon his breast. 

The footman bent his head ; 

Some seconds })assed ; no words he said; 



^4 ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGENARIAN. 

Tlien. as if from a dream just wolve. 
With languid lijis these few words spoke, 
lu hollow words of deep despair, 
•• "r is Master's boot-, I do declare." 
Sam. uow in fearful trepidation, 
{ Fearini^ he'd lose his situation ) 
Knowing the ladf's tt-nder heart, 
lie w'.nild to her his woes impart. 
Or else ( [>ardoii the digression ). 
He'd read of Eve and learnt a lesson : 
So, when the lady came down stairs. 
fie thus i)egan to explaiji affairs : 
With face of most lugubrious pattern. 
As if he had been chased by Satan, 
He thus began his doleful ditty 
In tones of soul-exciting pity : 
*' Youi- Lfjdyship, I've lived with you 
And, as your footnum. served you true. 
Was present when you were united, 
Lived with you when Sir John was knighted 
Bewailing now my sad estate, 
I'd ask of you a favor great ;" 
''Well, Sam, don't be afraid to say — 
I've oruessed it long, so. don't delav : 



ORIGINAL POEMS BX AN' OCTOGESARIaX. 

The prompt attentions jon ba?e paid 
To Sal. the pretty chamber-maid, 
Although Sir John and I. I know. 
Would sonv be for yon to go. 
But. as jon l>oth have so agreed. 
For ray part I will not impede. 
But will a friendly present make. 
And fruit will give for weilding-cake." 
" Sorrow and grief besiege my heart. 
And leave not room for Cupid's dart : 
Love's empire claims the sole domain — 
No other can admittance gaiu : 
Tbe troubles that assail my heart 
Are quite remote from Cupid's dart ; 
Last night I calmly went to rest : 
No cares or srrief my heart oppress'd, 
In peaceful slumber pass'd the night. 

And gladly hail'd the morning's light, 

But now the issues of the fall 

O'erpower my senses like a pall." 
" Whv. Sam I you were not there, yon know — 

How could it then affect you so ?** 
'•Oh. yes I your ladyship : had I Ijeen there. 

r«l have prevented all this sad affair : 



25 



26 ORTGI.VAL POEMS liY AX OCTOdEX ARIA X. 

W lieFi I this iiiori) tbt* ciirlicst dawn belieUL 
I hid I aros<» tliis troiil)]*' I'd dispelTd. 
Madam's reflections on the footman's speetdi : — 
(Minds, when disoi-dered. luMson overreach) 
Vt4 there seems som(4hin^ cf moi'e leeent date. 
As intenuin^linti" in the poor mans pate — 
l)\ whitli she p'ts an inklini^ of tin' tiiitli. 
And. trnd('i-heart»'d, ti'ies his grief to soothe. 
*' Xou, S;mii, cxphiin to me. so I see clear - 
So ril present it to my iinshand's eai- : 
Von SMV, I iind«*istand. tlie l)oots were drown'd ; 
r»Lit. lias not the col-oner hecii fonml ^ 
Bnt, 1 read, thev sit npon tlie Ijody. not the soh.' ; 
Over the lattei- tiiev have not control : 
Now. Sam, von don't seem well, go take your ease 
And I will try his anger to ap[)ease ; 
Bid Sue directly take the best tureen, 
And let the boots l^e nicely placed therein ; 
And wlien Sir John takes his seat, 
As of coui'se any quite unusual treat ; 
With due decorum. 

Place the tureen immediately before him." 
Now, Sue was such a merry-headed soul, 
'T was liard her facial muscles to control : 



ORIGIXAL POEMS HV AX OCTOGE^^ ARIAX. 2i 

And, iis she left the grinning kitehen-folks 
'Midst peals of hiiighter and hilarions jokes. 
(If anything than measles is 
More catching by contagion. 
It snrely is. yon innst admit. 
A tit of (-acliinnation. ) 

She tliouglit tliat m»w Sii* .Io!,ii should tline 
Oil l)oots no longer iloomed to sliine. 
So. Nature li«-iiig ovjM'tax tl. 
The miis<-l(*s (d' iier face r«da\' d. 
^'Now UA th«' IneaUfast Ix- l)roiight in. 
"Tis tim«', 1 think, wr sh<mhl hr^Hn : 

Yom- kiiiiV. p»'rha|is. y(>iril n«'»'d to whet ; 

Tho sttM'l is (h«M-('. now don't forget :"' 

On saying this, shr shamm"d a cough. 

In hope to sn:oth<M- up a laugh : 
"Sir John, you've often ])anter'd me 

On the time 1 take to dress ; 

Am] tliat it takes some time, of course, 

I'm willing to confess ; 

l>ut 1 will fifty guineas bet. 

And put the money down. 

That I will dress from head to foot, 

And everv i>arment dr)n. 



28 ORIGINAL POEMS BY AN OCTOGENARIAK. 

Before you can your luiuting-boots 
(Though smart you are) put ou ; 
'' Well, Madam, i£ that is your whim, 
Resolved to be so rash, 
1 certainly shall not object 
To pocketing the cash." 
••Done I" said the Lady, 'there they are ; 
Just lake them out and try ; . * 

Perhaps you'd better wait a while 
Aiul give them time to dry. 
Besides if you should try them now, 
No doubt you'd tind them tight, 
And then, of course, the work indeed, 
You'd find, would not be light ; 
''My-y-y boots! Now, really I are they ? — 
Or is all this but idle play ? 
If so, according to my mind. 
He'll find it an expensive kind ; 
He shall (of course 'tis Sam I mean) 
No longer in my house be seen : 
For, no such lazy, careless hound 
Must on my premises be found." 
"Sir John, Tve pleasant news to tell : 
The Post— vou, no doubt, heard the bell — 



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